Rest

I was raised by two savvy business people.  Both my parents worked/ work in sales, and boast an amazing work ethic.  My mom in particular worked hard as a woman in business to work and thrive in a position that she loves and gets paid appropriately for.  And this work ethic was passed down to me.  By the time I was in grade 12 I worked two jobs, went to school, played soccer, and kept up with the ongoings of teenage life. The idea of “keeping busy” and “staying out of trouble” and “working hard” was always prevalent. And I carried this into my adult life.  Always puttering, always finding things to do, never sitting down.  When I moved into my own basement suite after college, I didn’t even have a TV because I knew I would never sit down and watch it.  These ideas that chilling out to watch something was lazy, or unproductive were a part of my being.  Rest? Completely out of the question.  I thought that if you wanted more from life you had to work harder and work more, there was no time for rest.  

This belief of hustle culture pressed on until a number of years ago when I got deeper into yoga, meditation and my self growth.  I remember exploring more into meditation and yoga, and HATED meditation when I started.  My brain felt insanely overloaded and unfocused; loud and distracting.  It was challenging and uncomfortable to sit with (which is one of the many reasons why meditation and mindfulness practices are so necessary).  I did my best to sit with these thoughts in my meditation times, but outside of those times I still needed to be busy.  Always working, always moving, cleaning, puttering, re-organizing, talking, thinking, doing.  Human doing.  But I persevered with the meditation and I remember one day reading something along the lines of “when you take time to meditate and rest, it gives time back to you”.  Now I don’t know the exact quote or even where I saw it but it stuck with me.  I was curious.  And as I continue to grow with this practice of meditation or mindfulness, I am slowly learning more about what this means.  And what I have begun to learn so far is that when I am feeling busy and overwhelmed and there is too much “to-do”, that is when I need meditation or rest the most.  When I take this rest, or set aside time to meditate or be present and quiet with myself, I can listen.  I can hear more about my body.  I can sink deeper into what I truly want, need and desire.  I start to feel less anxious and more clarity.  Clarity towards what really matters for that exact day, and even moment.  It brings forward my values and intuition so I can make a more informed decision, or have a greater idea of what needs to be done, and a greater idea of what truly is important to me, my health, my family, and those ripple effects into my life and community.  

When you take time to be present with yourself, you give time back to yourself. 

But also when you take time to be present with yourself you can be present with those around you.  Since having my son, this has become the greatest ongoing lesson.  Does it matter that the house is a mess vs spending full present moments with him? I struggle with this constantly, feeling that pull towards what i should be doing, and trying to stay with him.  In the moment, while his developing brain is picking up all the nuanced ways of being human.  And that is what I want him to learn: to BE human.  Not to do more to live in this space of burnout and anxiety and overwhelm that much of our population lives in.  But to BE.  To enjoy and to live and love and have gratitude.  Isn’t this what we all want for every human and being that is among us? 

When you open your eyes and heart to this, the clarity is uncovered.  Those things on the “to-do” list that seemed urgent are in fact not urgent, and having the awareness allows you to put those parts of the list on the back burner.  It allows you to come forward and focus on what truly impacts this precise moment and brings you back to your truest self and truest values.  

Being caught in hustle culture is all too ingrained.  It allows capitalism to thrive.  It allows you to be a cog in the wheel to keep going and to keep contributing and to keep doing.  Which I would say in some aspects are important of course.  But what if we could all live and be? What if we could put this hustle culture behind us and live from a place of authenticity and belonging.  

You know that these eight hour work days are made to keep us “busy”.  That the constructs of our society are not always in your best interest, which feels out of your control.  But you can control your body and mind.  You can decide to unlearn, learn, and re learn to rest.  To contemplate.  To honour your body and your mind. 

When you begin to step into mindfulness, and allow your body to rest and recover, you can heal the various parts of yourself that need it most.  

So I encourage you to right now even, take a moment, or a minute or several if you can, and rest.  Rest your mind, rest your body, and replenish your soul so you can continue to do the good, heart centered work that you can do.